Voyager Top Ten Lists

Top Ten Rumors Ruthie Wants To Start About Season 5
Ruth -- 26 May 1998, 1:10 PM

10.	Hair rumor no. 1: Fed up with the complaints of female fans who want him to stop dyeing his hair jet black, Beltran has exploded and screamed, "you want white, I'll give you white!" and returned to the set with the short spiked cut of season one, only this time it is bleached platinum blond, making him look suspiciously like Billy Idol.
9.	TPTB apparently meant it when they decided they were going to move into an entirely new direction with Harry Kim's character --- next season, in addition to playing the clarinet, he will branch out and start playing the BASS clarinet. Can the oboe be far behind?
8.	Realizing they can no longer avoid the issue, the writers have penned an episode wherein Tuvok goes through Pon Farr. The result? A loss of ship's power for a week, another shuttle crash, and two very pregnant Delaney sisters.
7.	Ayala finally speaks. And, as it turns out, he doesn't really have anything all that interesting to say.
6.	Because of overwhelming fan support of the Harry-Seven pairing, TPTB plan to give Our Favorite Couple the wedding of the year during the November Sweeps period! Janeway will give away the bride, B'Elanna will be Maid of Honor, Tom will be Best Man (natch), and an emotional Tuvok will sing "Sunrise-Sunset" at the reception. Word on the street is that Neelix, apparently the only person on the ship to have ever had an intimate relationship, provides a hilarious moment when he tries, unsuccessfully, to explain the Birds and the Bees to Harry.
	Note to Nebulites: I'm starting this one mainly for the "ick" value.
5.	Hair rumor no. 2: Our Darling Tom has joined the Hair Club for Men! His new hair is so thick and luxurious that he crashes the first shuttle of the season when he can't see the view screen because his bangs are too long.
4.	Kes returns to the ship with her new lifemate E-Ric to help the crew get home. It turns out that E-Ric is an inhabitant of the planet YAM, a highly evolved species of cartographers who have created detailed maps of the Delta Quadrant, which are nonetheless useless to the Voyager crew because their innumerable misspellings make them indecipherable.
3.	The crew will meet yet another AOTW in the season opener. Before allowing him on the ship, however, they ask him for two forms of picture ID, two letters of reference, and a $100 security deposit.
2.	Hair rumor no. 3: Kate Mulgrew returned to the set with her hair dyed golden blond and pulled back into a tight chignon. When asked why she decided to make the change, she shrugged and said, "no reason," while, at the same time, she nervously played with the shiny new metal implant that has been placed over her left eyebrow.
1.	I've heard about what sounds like a surefire episode for next season: "Resolutions 2." Janeway and Chakotay are in a shuttle delivering badly needed supplies to a planet whose people survive solely on French champagne, Swiss chocolates and oysters. Chakotay's the pilot. I don't really need to say more do I?

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