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Shootout At The O'Kay Corral

ande — 27 Aug 1997

Inspired by the totally wierd fan fic being posted lately i thought up this little episode while ingaged in a water pistol fight at the pool. I hope it isn't too stupid.

Neelix was at a loss as to what to do about the decrease in moral that had occured after Kes departed. As the cheif moral officer, it was his duty to see that the happy spirits returned to the crew. He turned as the door to the holosweet opened and watched as Tom and Harry enterd.

"Hi, Tom, Harry, how are the best officers in the DQ doing today? Can I interest you in a game of volleyball?

"Not really Neelix, we just came here to be out of our quarters," Harry said as he moved over to one of the loungchairs and sat down.

"Yeah, I'm not really in the mood either Neelix. Nothing seems very fun without Kes around." Tom moved around to sit with harry and was soon joined by B'elanna and Ayala.

Neelix scratched his head and watched as the crewmen sat in silence by the pool. "I've got to do something." Just then a thought came to Neelix. He remembered a story Tom had told him about camp. He quickly walked over to the replicator and replicated a few items.

"What the... Neelix what are you doing?" exclaimed Tom as he felt the cold, wet splatter of water on the back of his neck.

"Oh, I just thought of a way to have a little fun," and he let loose a stream of H2O in Harry's direction. Harry, being the true inner light that he was, ducked and let the water catch Ayala right in the face.

"AAhhg," Ayala did a flip over the back of the chair and ended up falling in the deep end of the pool, thus ending only his second speaking part of the show.

There was a mad dash as the crew quickly took what cover they could find. Tom being the quick witted person he is stealthfully made his way to the replicator and replicated a very large watergun, then began making his way to the pool to fill it up. He ignored Ayala, who was quietly drowning, and filled his gun to capacity. Seeing B'elanna's rear end exposed he quickly made his assault to her posterier.

"Huh, oh my God that was cold. Who the ... Tom, you dirt eating Patq, why did you just do that?"

"Hey, all's fair in love and war B'el"

"Then I guess you just declared war helmboy. Prepare to be wet enough to require GILLS!"


Meanwhile on the bridge...

"Commander, anything out of the ordinary on the scaners?"

"No, Captain, I was just going to turn over the bridge to the next shift and head down to the holoresort when you came out of your ready-room."

"Well, I think I'll join you if you don't mind. I haven't been to the resort since Tom turned the place into Disneyland and crashed the computer by taking too many rides on Space Mt."

"Always a pleasure to have you join me Captain," Chakotay said with a sly grin.


The captain and Chakotay are suprised to find water comming out from under the door of the holosweet as they approach.

"What on earth is going on in there?"

"I don't know Captain, but it sounds like a war is going on in there!"

They enter the holodeck to find pandimonium. B'elanna is chasing Tom (no suprise there) around the pool frantically waving some sort of dayglow colored pistol at him, cursing because it's not functioning properly. Tom is making faces at her and sticking out his tongue chanting "Missed me, Missed me , Now you got to kiss me!" To which B'el responds by taking Harry's pistol away from him and pushing him in the deep end with a still trying to stay afloat Ayala, "Take this flyboy," and levels him with a shot of ice cold water right in his wide open mouth.

<sputter> "Yuck, B'elle, <cough> you don't know where that waters been. Gross, somebody could have peed in the pool."

"Think about that the next time you shoot me in the ass!"

Janeway and Chakotay look on with total shock at the scene around them. Harry and Ayala are holding on to eachother for dear life in the pool, Tom and B'elanna are still ducking and firing at eachother over by the beachchairs, some of the other crewmen are chasing eachother aournd, and everyone is soaking wet!

"Well, captian, what should we do about this?"

"Commander, <in her best 'listen-up I'm about to inpart some wisdom here voice'> If you can's beat 'em, join 'em."

"I beg your pardon, Captain, but are you suggesting we...umfff."

"Nailed by my compression water rifle. Commander you should really learn when to duck."


Neelix looked at the utter chaos surrounding him and smiled to himself. "Oh, Kes, I hope you're seeing this."

The End