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Voyager Top Ten Lists

Top Ten Issues Raised If Ken Starr Was In Charge Of Investigating Voyager's Disappearance
Leonie -- 18 Aug 1998, 8:59 AM

The primary issue that started the investigation was

10.Did Janeway not follow the Prime Directive when she blew up the Caretaker's Array or did she just feel like it because she was the captain, she was in power and she felt that she could do as she d@mn well please?
Having not found anything that he could pin on her the next issue raised would be:
9.Is Janeway a capable captain? Was she correct in following the Prime Directive in the instance that she did not interfere in the natural evolution of the Pralor and Cavik robots and help them pro-create?
But really and truly the crew rally didn't care about that. They were stuck in the delta quadrant whether she was right or wrong. It was a done deal. So he tried another tactic to prove that Janeway was incompetent.
8.Did she invite Tom Paris on board as the Helmsman so that she could have illegitimate offspring with him? Is this another was that she missuses the power of her captaincy that the Starfleet and Marquis people have bestowed on her?
 (During this part of the investigations, a picture of the salamander offspring with gray-gray-blue eyes will confirm that those are indeed hers and Tom's. This is not really necessary as it was entered into the ship's log, but there was an air of the dramatic with this revelation that finally got the crew interested.)
7.Did she grant special privileges to Lt. Paris in light of their "improper affair" by rubbing her hip against his shoulder as he sits at the Conn because she knew it gave him a thrill? Why didn't she do it for other members of the crew who flew Voyager occasionally? What about the fact that she always seemed to be breaking the Lt. out of prison, but for her chief engineer, she was willing to allow a lobotomy to be performed on her? Was she jealous of the two Lt's relationship?
 (That really got the crew interested.)
6.And speaking of affairs. Did she or did she not have an affair with her first officer on the "Resolutions" planet?
 (The monkey would be hunted down and forced to give his eyewitness testimony via secured com line from the planet during the investigation)
5.Did she or didn't she mate with Q? Is that why Chakotay was jealous? What about Tom? Did she tell him to lie to Tuvok when he conducted his investigation of Janeway's sexual exploits at Chakotay's request when he was questioning her ability to be captain after the Borg incident?
 (He didn't even bother to touch that, he knew that most of the crew, didn't care. They were one of two Starfleet Vessels in the entire history of the Fleet, not too lose one crewman to the Borg. He knew that they would never question her leadership in that incident.)
4.Did she know that her actions with Paris, would later on be seen by the crew as being unfaithful to the Directives of Starfleet, "to seek out new life and new civilizations". The Directive that she swore that she would always uphold as a Starfleet officer.
 (At this point the crew would be puzzled. What did her sleeping with Paris have to do with the way she ran the ship? They were still alive, weren't they? According to one crewmember, a Mr. Ayala. "I thought that she did seek out new life by creating them with Mr. Paris.")
To all of these accusations, the Captain would
3.State that she did have an improper relationship with Paris at the time she gave birth to those amphibians, but she didn't remember it, so she must not have enjoyed it.
2.Say that the ones that had been hurt the most throughout the four years of this investigation were 'my partner, First Officer Chakotay and my little man at Ops, Harry'
1.Then she would whip out Betsy and blast Mr. Starr through Borg space and beyond.

At this, the crew would give a collective sigh of relief. Over 70% of them couldn't care less what the captain did in her personal life as long as she got them back to the alpha quadrant. They were grateful that no more of their hard-earned replicate rations were going to be spent on Mr. Starr's investigations. Besides, compared to some of the relationships that they've had since they've been stranded here with their significant others being in the alpha quadrant, well the captain was a 40 year old prude.