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Voyager Top Ten Lists

Top Ten Answering Machine Messages Left By Voyager Personnel
Leonie -- 25 Apr 1997, 18:13 GMT

10.Extra: "This is the unnamed extra, if I don't get a speaking part in the time it takes for me to get your message, I will not die and be able to return your call."
9.Neelix: "As your Moral Officer, whatever your needs, I'm willing to help. I am away poking my nose into someone else's business, that is to say, helping someone else, I'll get back to you as soon as I can. In the mean time, try some leeola root."
8.Kim: "Hi my name is"Harry, death becomes me" Kim (I salute you Ginny, that was brilliant) I'm out experiencing the after life, death, cloning and unexplained spatial and temporal anomilies. If you leave a message, I'll get back to you as soon as I get back to myself."
7.Kes: "There would be no need for you to leave this message if my people hadn't lost their mental abilities because they stopped using them when they gained a tallent for dependence. As it is leave a message and I will sense you as soon as I can."
6.The Doctor: "This is the emergency medical holographic doctor speaking. I am a doctor, not a secretary, so leave your message on the machine at the sound of the tone."
5.Tuvok: "This is Tuvok. It is illogical for you to leave a message on my machine since you can use your communicator to contact me if your request is urgent. If it is not, my schedule is posted outside my office door so that you will know where I am at every interval. Please do not act this irrationally again."
4.Paris: "This is Tom Paris. I'm not in right now, but if you leave your name, number, eye and hair color, skin type, dimensions and the night on which you're free, I'll be sure to date you as soon as I can."
3.Torres: "Hi, I'm out right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll get back to hurt you as soon as possible."
2.Chakotay: "The Angry Warrior is not in right now, please leave you name, number and the location of your quarters, I'll tell you a story as soon as I can."
1.Janeway: "This is Janeway. I'm out investigating the lastes anomily right now. If your are calling to say that you disagree with me, please leave your name and co-ordinates so that I can respond to you with "the deadliest of force" as soon as possible."